Fashion

Wearing Pants to a Funeral: No Compromise on Respect and Casual

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As society gets more casual in our daily lives, it’s no surprise to see many women wearing pants to a funeral. Lesley is showcasing her look for the idea and sharing her experience with some important funerals in her life.

Quote of the day: “Ultimately a genuine leader is not a searcher for consensus, but a molder of consensus.” Martin Luther King Jr.

We seem to have many rules and thoughts about what to wear to a funeral. In fact, it’s a popular Google search and we have discussed it many times in the past.
Yet our society is different from others, and times are changing. So let’s explore the idea of wearing pants to a funeral, and feel free to join in with your thoughts.

Lesley shares her thoughts about wearing pants for funerals: “These days and especially out in this part of the country, women’s attire is much more casual and that includes what is appropriate for funerals.  Of course, you shouldn’t wear your brightest jacket or dress, but you should dress stylishly to honor the departed and show respect.” 

“For my mother’s funeral/ celebration of life, we all wore bright vibrant colors that momma loved.  She HATED black so that was out.” 

Related posts:
Can you wear color for funerals?
Classic funeral outfits

“Then for my husband, Wayne’s, funeral, that was just for family, I wore a red-flowered kimono that he liked me to wear. I did wear the kimono over a black dress, however.  For his celebration of life, I wore a blue dress and tan kimono very similar to this color combination I’m showing today.”

Wearing pants to a funeral in the summer

Pants: Chicos~~ Kimono: Chicos~~ Top: Chicos~~ Shoes: Bella Marie-online~~ Necklace: Coldwater Creek~~Purse: no label-thrifted

Wearing Pants for a Funeral

Most of us consider a funeral a very somber affair. Yet it’s also a fact of life. And if you’ve been to many funerals, then you know it can also be a time of celebration. In fact, I tend to learn a lot about the deceased that I never knew before going to the funeral service.

So Lesley basically recreated Wayne’s celebration of life outfit from 4 years ago. Even though she’s wearing color, it’s more muted colors and seems solemn.

Older women style in summer

Wearing a Kimono for a Funeral

A kimono is quite a multi-purpose clothing item. Its popularity is due to the fact that it can be dressed up or down depending on what you pair it with. It’s also perfect for the warmer seasons since it’s not tight or constricting.

Related post: Kimono for a fall outfit

Insider tip: If your kimono seems too big and overpowering, I have many ways to fix that. There are 5 different ways to change it up in this blog post. And 8 options in this YouTube video.

Don’t have a kimono that works with the outfit you want to wear? Don’t forget that you can easily create one with a large scarf. Just knot the ends together on each side which creates a sleeve.
Another option?? Take a gander at your summer bathrobes, because if you remove the belt, they can act as a kimono too.

Kimonos are one of those items that you can find even at the young girl’s stores. Yet they are truly ageless.
And while many are bright and colorful, there are just as many that are darker in color too.

Are Accessories Appropriate for a Funeral?

What exactly are accessories? As an analogy, they are the gift wrapping on a present, the cherry on a sundae, or the pillows on a couch. By adding in these extras, you are finishing off the look with pieces that show your personality.

Lesley wore this multi-strand beaded necklace that she has had for ages. Even though there are trends even in the accessory world, it’s like all clothing in that everything comes back in style. PLUS the advantage of accessories is that you can gain 10 pounds and they still fit.

This kind of necklace is wonderful for bringing the attention up to your face and tying in the colors of what you’re wearing. You might be worried that it would be “too much” with a print kimono, but nothing could be further from the truth.

Insider tip: Remember “too much” is one of those fashion rules that has been propagated for too long. Our outsides should resemble our insides, and we all have multiple emotions.

A purse is something needed for the occasion too, and Lesley kept it subtle by having it blend into the same colors of the outfit.

Insider tip: Make sure you don’t forget to add tissues in your purse and waterproof mascara when you apply your makeup!

Wearing pants to a funeral with a kimono

Which Pants are Appropriate for a Funeral?

Of course, you could wear the basic black pants, but don’t think other pants wouldn’t work too. Lesley opted for a camel color brown that is also found in the kimono.
You really want to think about pants that are going to be comfortable for both sitting and standing.

Lesley has these straight-leg pants from Chicos (heck, the entire outfit is from Chicos), and they create an unobtrusive background for the idea of wearing pants to a funeral.

In my opinion, for the hotter days, it’s also appropriate to wear cropped pants or capris. As long as the entire look is giving the vibe you are aiming for, the length shouldn’t matter.
It’s not different than if you wore a skirt or dress that stops at your knees.

Insider tip: Remember to analyze the specific points of what you are wearing. Sometimes we get something into our head (like I can’t wear capris to a funeral) that doesn’t make sense. It’s the overall look that counts. Describing your pieces instead of categorizing them can help. Just as I said, if you would wear a skirt that stops at your knees, then possibly your capris could work too.

Tan pants for older women

What Color and Type of Shoes for a Funeral

The reality of attending a funeral is there can be multiple times we are standing and sitting. Plus there is the possibility of going out to the cemetery too.
For those reasons, it’s good to think about comfortable shoes and maybe even flats.

Lesley chose a camel-colored flat shoe to match her camel-colored pants. It’s not about looking taller or leaner, but it is about the shoe blending in and not standing out. She was concentrating on making the outfit respectable.

Personally, I do think in the summer, that you could certainly wear sandals to a funeral too. Maybe not the best time for flip-flops unless the funeral is on the beach, but I’m sure you can find something appropriate for the weather and the occasion.

Summer style: wearing pants to a funeral
Wearing pants to a funeral

Photo credit: Rob Filogomo

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